Green Bay: You Can Leave Your Trash Behind

WARNING: Wisconsin-centric post coming up:

All right, a chance to engage in Appleton snobbery (because, other than the Packers, Green Bay is completely inferior to the Fox Cities)!! Austin Straubel "International" Airport is lucky enough to receive a garbage sterilizer for disposing of trash from international flights. According to the linked article, officials believe that this could serve as an impetus to have more international flights come into Green Bay.

Three things here: First, the idea that any international commercial flights will ever come into Green Bay is laughable. Per the airport website, you can fly directly from Green Bay to the following cities:

Chicago (O'Hare)
Minneapolis-St. Paul
Detroit
Milwaukee
Marquette, MI

Yes, I am sure the direct flights from Heathrow, de Gaulle, Narita, Pearson, Frankfurt, etc will quickly be added to the list. Never mind not having any flights to states that don't border Wisconsin, Straubel will get them all.

Even Appleton's crappy little airport serves more destinations (Las Vegas, Orlando, Atlanta, and Denver are all direct destinations from ATW, although in fairness there is no direct flight from Appleton to Marquette. That must be one of the loneliest customs offices in the country over there at Straubel.

Second, if private international flights need to go to a city with a real airport, they are not going to go to Green Bay because they can dump their trash there. Imagine how this might go:

Pilot: "You know, you have a meeting in Chicago, but we need to get rid of this trash, so we're diverting to Green Bay, Wisconsin. Sure, you need to go to Chicago, but in Green Bay, you can clear customs faster...and, no trash."

Rich international flyer: "Uh, how far is Green Bay from Chicago?"

Pilot: "336 kilometers."

RIF: "Wrong answer, we're flying to Chicago."

Third, what reason short of the Packers does anyone outside of the Midwest ever have to go to Green Bay? Bay Beach? The National Railroad Museum? Oh wait, I know...it's because Preble High School has a huge following throughout the world. That must be it. That's why people will want to come to Green Bay from all over the world, the Green Bay Preble Hornets.

Come to Green Bay!! Don't worry about your exotic trash, we'll take care of it!